From lazyboy@ix.netcom.com Sun Dec 10 15:00:25 GMT 1995 [all quoted material taken from "The Emotional Tone Scale", published by Bridge Publications, Inc.] FACT or FICTION: L.Ron Hubbard developed a method to "invariably predict human nature"? pg.2 It's true! It's terrific! It's the Tone Scale! C'mon, let's get busy. How many times have you been bewildered or just plain confused by the seemingly irrrational behavior of your fellow man? Why, you ask yourself, did the boss yell at me? I didn't do anything wrong. Why did that guy cut me off in traffic? Belly button piercing? Woody and Peter Nathan Hass - why? We've all asked these questions and we've all been stumped for the solution - until now! Forget everything you knew about livin' cause you ain't been livin' if you ain't been livin' with THE TONE SCALE! It's fast, fun and infallible! (pg. 2 ) You can't beat those odds. The Church of Scientology has been using this amazing Tone Scale Technology for years, handling everything from squirrel groups to Usenet groups, how's that for workable! The results speak for themselves, INFALLIBLE! C'mon, let's get more busy and learn how to use the powerful Tone Scale Technology for our own plans of world domination! "With this data, it is possible to accurately predict the behavior of a potential spouse, a business partner, employee or friend - before you commit to a relationship. The risks involved in human interaction can be avoided entirely or minimized when you can infallibly predict how people will behave." pg.2 Human interaction *can* be risky. Why risk raiding the wrong guy or "outing" the wrong anonymous poster? Leaping before you look could result in the type of bad publicity that many large organizations or individuals try to avoid. Who needs thousands of previously unmotivated or unconcerned individuals eyeballing your darkest secrets or exposing your most twisted lies? Save that headache for the suckers who don't use THE TONE SCALE! They don't understand how easy it is to know, "after a very short time, how people will behave in any given circumstance. You can. Each and every time." (p.2) Yes, you can...but first you must understand a few Tone Scale basics. The Tone Scale was made-up by L. Ron Hubbard. Hubbard did a lot of making-up when it came to the Tone Scale so we know it is extra-smart and infallible. Don't think that Hubbard just sat in his bedroom and made-up the Tone Scale, he didn't. "By various calculations about the energy of life, by observation and by test, this Tone Scale is able to give levels of behavior as life declines." pg.3 See! LRH used energy of life calculations and tests and observation while inventing the Tone Scale. And you thought he just 'thunk-up' the whole thing while sitting in his bedroom. Obviously this serious Tone Scale inventing business would take a laboratory. Maybe LRH had a laboratory in his bedroom. Who knows? The important thing to understand is that the Tone Scale couldn't be infallible if it weren't based on the accurate energy of life calculations that Hubbard used, I imagine. Anyway, the Tone Scale "plots the descending spiral of life from full vitality and consciousness through half-vitality and half-consciousness down to death." pg.3 In other words, important, not just 'thunk-up', stuff. Like any scale, the Tone Scale has numbers. Don't run away! These numbers are easy to learn even though they are infallible and created by a genius. If you want to dominate the world you will have to learn these numbers, besides...it's fun. The only numbers you will really need to concern yourself with are 4.0 (this is really good...if you are 4.0 you are lots of great things), 3.5 (not bad, sir), 3.0 (hey, doing good), 2.5 (hello, mr.average), 2.0 (hmm, needing some work), 1.5 (what's your problem), 1.1 (stay away, you bad man), 0.5 ( you are bad, but really listless). The Tone Scale does go all the way to 40.0 and down to -40.0...but don't worry about it (40.0 is god-like while -40.0 is sort of the opposite). Stick with 4.0, 3.5, 3.0, 2.5, 2.0, 1.5, 1.1 Yes, 3.3 or 2.6 or other variations between 4.0 and 0.0 are possible...but just stick with the biggies. See, it wasn't that hard...but what does it all mean? What it means could be the difference between life and death! Let's say you calculate that the person you will be raiding is 1.1 on the Tone Scale. According to the Tone Scale a 1.1 will always behave in a certain way. Because the Tone Scale is infallible we know that it is not ever, ever wrong. Once we calculate a person's 1.1ness we can proceed accordingly, we know how they will react to the raid. According to the Tone Scale a 1.1 is capable of "occasional underhanded displays of action, otherwise cowardly." Our 1.1 victim is a coward. We don't have to expect much resistance or back-talk. Cool! Remember, the Tone Scale is infallible. Don't raid a 4.0 without expecting a fight. According to the Tone Scale a 4.0 has a "high courage level". Your 4.0 might not shut-up, might fight your efforts to silence them, might expose your secrets to the world, might fight you tooth and nail. Thank goodness we used the Tone Scale and didn't raid any 4.0's. (Caution: Don't try any bacteria-based biological warfare attacks on a 4.0. A 4.0 is "nearly immune to bacteria". All bacteria? I guess so. Isn't some bacteria *good* bacteria? Shut up.) Great, but how do I determine a where a person is on the infallible Tone Scale? Simple, Obnosis and Psychometry. Obnosis is a smarty-smart, scientific sounding word that simply means "observing the obvious". Would "observing the obvious" be found in a TECHNOLOGY? No, obnosis sounds much more technological. "Psychometry is the measurement if mental traits, abilities and processes." (pg.20). (If you think you are practicing Obnosis when you say, " It is ironic that the CoS encourages the use of psychometry considering it's bitter and unreasonable battle against ALL psychiatry.", you aren't. You are just being too big for your britches....shut up. ) Obnosis is easy. It is a way of looking at the "isness" (p.12) of something. Let's practice. Look at your keyboard. What do you see? It has keys! One key has an "A" printed on it! One key has a "B"! See, obnosis is easy. Let's try another example. Look at a late photo of LRH. What do you see? I see purple lips! I see bloating! I see a receeding hairline! See, obnosis is easy...but so what? Look at the isness of a person's eyes, fool! This will help you place your fellow man in a pigeon-hole they from which they can never escape...unless they pay the CoS for auditing. 2.5 (boredom) - eyes wander, person will sometimes look at you. 1.5 (anger) "person will look away from you, deliberately". (p.15), person will look at you unpleasantly. 1.0 (fear) person will not look at you. "People are too dangerous to look at." (p.14). 0.5(grief) looks at floor ...don't confuse this with the traits of a 1.0 person...very different. Obnosis is your first tool, the "two minute psychometry" (p.20) is your second invaluable tool to judge where your fellow man stands on the Tone Scale. This one is easy as well. Start talking to a person "at the highest possible tone level, creatively and constructively, and then gradually drop the tone of one's conversation down to the point where it achieves response from the person." (p.20) The person will respond to the tone level they are most comfortable with - their own! ( Warning: "one should not carry any particular band of conversation too long, not more than a sentence or two, because this will have a tendency to raise slightly the tone of the person and so spoil the accuracy of the test." (p.20) You've been warned. We want those infallible Tone Scale results!) Here is a sample "two minute psychometry". Try it on your friends! Hey, gang, let's go make a kite! (did you get an equally positive response? Good, your friend is a 4.0! ps. "Why don't you take a fucking hike" is not a positive response.) How about them Denver Broncos? (did you get a response? Hold on to that 3.something pal of yours! ) I think our hometown football team is not very good. (response? Say hello to your 2.whatever buddy) I hate being having a cold. (response? Hmmm...maybe someone else will go to the movies with you.) I hear Peter Nathan Hass thinks Woody's isness is hunk-isness! (watch out for this "friend" if they responded to this sort of discreditable gossip) Why do I bother? I quit. (response? RUN! RUN! RUN!) Now try the two-minute psychometry on a stranger! It works! (my own research finds that NO ONE is 4.0! No one wants to build a kite. Most people just look at me with covert hostility. Low toned bastards!) Ok, now i've got obnosis and psychometry under my belt, what comes next? PRACTICE! Go out in the world and put the Tone Scale Whammy on all you meet. (ps. don't tell them where they place on the Tone Scale...it would be rude and could hurt their case. Just treat them like the 1.1 they are!) "Take a clipboard and paper and interview people on the street. Ask them some sample questions such as "What's the most obvious thing about me?" "When was the last time you had a haircut?"" (p.22) etc. Soon you will be a master of Spotting the Tone! After you can accurately spot the tone, raise the tone. Keep messing with complete strangers. They love it! Notice how when you first approach people they all seem to be sorta low on the Tone Scale. They don't look directly at you, they seem nervous and shifty. You can use your amazing Tone Scale skills to raise their tone (but not to much) by saying positive things. "I like your haircut"., "I like your dress", " You seem to be a reasonable person"....etc...watch their tone improve right before your eyes....AMAZING! Yes, the Tone Scale is amazing and infallible. The Tone Scale isn't just useful for judging inviduals, " this Tone Scale is also valid for groups." (p.19) Yes, groups...big groups. "A business or a nation can be examined as to its various standard reactions and these can be plotted." (p.19) Imagine, invaribly predicting the behavior of a country, a business, or a Usenet news group. It works, it's infallible! Just ask Scamizdat. A big, big XuXa kiss to all the beautiful peoples on #scientology, Stephen Jones